Forget About It is a That Guy with the Glasses show I never really paid any attention to until it was recommended to me by a friend who apparently likes it unironically, but I can’t tell you for sure because I refuse to talk to him now. The show is hosted by Sad Panda, the same guy who does all of those droning, horrible end-credit themes that Phelous and Nostalgia Critic have in their videos these days.
Panda is one of Phelous’ cronies and probably owes his position on the site, or at least much of his popularity on the site, to his cameo and crossover appearances in the aforementioned’s videos. I always felt like Phelous sort of slid him into the site under everyone’s noses in the same way that Nostalgia Chick slid Nella and Elisa in and became “Team NChick”. I don’t know enough of the site’s behind the scenes history to make a definitive statement on that nonsense though, so it’s all speculation. I’d probably look a little more into it if that were the point of this article and I was giving more than a negligible amount of fucks, but that’s life.
The hard and fast premise of Forget About It is that Panda reviews movies that he hasn’t seen in a while, and only covers what he remembers from them.
Essentially, Panda feigns stupidity while he talks about a movie. This doesn’t feel at all natural. It’s obviously been scripted from top to bottom with no room for improvisation, which is something that would greatly benefit the kind of humor Panda is going for here. I don’t believe for a second that this is all the man remembers from the Harry Potter films, this is just the only opportunities for pop culture references he could think of. Hey guys, Natalie Portman sure is a female actress who has been in movies! Hey, Ron has red hair! Fuck Gingers am I right guys? There’s a castle, can I mention Camelot? Ok, here’s a clip from Monty Python! Get it, it’s only a model! THAT WAS IN AN ACTUAL FUNNY MOVIE! FUCKING LAUGH YOU PLEABS!!
Humor is a powerful tool in adding to or changing our understanding of a subject, some of the most memorable comedians have the reputations they have because they made us think while they made us laugh. Not deviating too far from the subject matter at hand, go check out Red Letter Media and their film reviews(both Plinkett and Half in the Bag) to see what I’m talking about. With that said, here is my question; what does this say about ANYTHING? What does this do? How does this serve to inform anyone’s opinion or perception of anything? What purpose does this serve aside from entertaining the easily entertained?
But it’s not even just that, a common criticism of TGWTG is that the ego of some of its producers is over inflated when “anyone could do what they do” and I don’t entirely agree with that because some of the people on that site are honestly pretty good and put a lot of work into their videos. (Sure, it’s not very many of them and the percentage shrinks almost daily with every new contributor picked up by the site being more of an unfunny, derivative, ass kissing hack than the last, but that’s a different discussion for another article.) That isn’t the case here though; this is too easy, it’s too lazy. Anyone could do this. Heck, I can do this. Don’t believe me; I’ll pull a random piece of media off my shelf and do the same thing here, in text form. So, without further ado, welcome to the first and only episode of…
MAN-CHILD MESSIAH CAN’T REMEMBER FUCK!
Castlevania: Lament of Innocence
Castlevania: Symphony of the Night is a point and click adventure game in the Metroidvania style made famous by earlier entries in the Castlevania series, such as Castlevania 2: Simon’s Quest on the NES and Bram Stoker’s Dracula on the Sega CD. In this installment you play as Sephiroth, in a baffling bit if interfranchise continuity between Final Fantasy and Castlevania.
Sephiroth with his trusty Buster Sword
Along the way you meet others in the castle, such as Buffy the Vampire Slayer, who is in the castle looking for her boyfriend, famous Russian pianist and vampire hunter Sviatoslav Teofilovich Richter.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Sviatoslav Teofilovich Richter
But before all of that, Sephiroth gets all of his weapons taken away by SpoonyOne as the Gate Keeper.
Send $5 to my paypal now and get this high quality photograph of the SpoonyOne signed by the SpoonyOne himself printed on professional grade paper with a cool glossy finish!
As the game nears its conclusion, we find out that Buffy’s boyfriend is under dark spell of Shaft, unfortunately they could not get Richard Roundtree to reprise the role, so I don’t even understand why this character is in here.
I'm just talkin' about Shaft.
Shaft plans to resurrect Sephiroth’s father Edward Cullen and plunge humanity into 1,000 years of darkness or something.
All evil vampires are Edward Cullen. It's funny because Twilight was a bad book about vampires. SUCK ON THAT TEENY BOPPERS!
Geez, this is fucking stupid, I won’t go on any further, later episodes don’t fare much better and even start abusing the “Meta means pointing out that we do stupid shit and still doing it anyway” gag that so many TGWTG producers have been using the last year to try and validate their dead horse shticks. Point is, this isn’t clever, it’s lazy and stupid.
Next time, we’ll look at the origin Man-Child Messiah in…
MAN-CHILD MESSIAH: YEAR ONE
